The type of

control i have over mah anti-pancreatic disposition is apparently meant for individuals with at least ten years of life left. good to know! So i can buy tickets for TAO 2020? SHKITTLES!

C’est la vie… Boheme.

- and I wouldn’t have it any other way. CHEERS to evolution and REvolution, where there is a will, there is a way, and millions of delights with that way.

I have to say that life, bittersweet as it may be, is best as such. I hope all y’all childrens will come to agree with me when I say that every moment is nothing but phenomenal, in it’s own way. 

Tonight/Earlier Today/ThisWeek…

Schieze was… a plethora of different emotions, experiences, conversations… from elegy & excrement (WOW that sounds despicable) to elation & eroticism (but only between we three [elina,liza,myself] [andJefftheBaristO]). Cheers to the short amount of time we spend on this earth and what we discover during that time. Cheers to friends, foes, forget-me-nots and fuckwhats.  

  Morning/Noon - sleep in and sleep off the 1/3d-1/2 bottle o’wine i drank at the Pig (via ultra-ghetto SoBe bottle) last night, June the 2nd. Wake up to shower and scour for black garment. Locate an appropriate black dress, black shoes… Do NOT style hair, wear makeup, fix anything , etc (religiously inappropriate to a relative’s funeral - thou must comest simple). 
        Two-30PM to ThreePM - HollywoodForever Cemetery with the immediate family prior to the chapel ceremony for grandfather, dearest. Have my heartbroken grandmother look one last time at the physiognomy of the man she lived with and loved for 49 years. The man she bore children for and took care of as a child when time came. Have Grams breakdown (as expected) calling out how cold and unfamiliar Grandpa’s lifeless body was - as she cried out compliments and sweet-(forever)nothings. Composure! Composure! Composure young lass!! Fuck composure. I still tried and dare I say succeeded. Refused to have the balls to look at his embalmed soulless Rigor Mortis, figured I’d live with any regret I may have and remember him as painfully aged and brilliantly happy. 
  ThreePM-4PM - RefuJew style memorial service, tasteful. Spent comforting Grams since we’ve promised to take care of one another now that she had no one to look after and I never really was… looked after. & - Daddy Dearest hasn’t said much of a word to anyone in days, so not much from that and trivial words from Madre aren’t much of an aide. RabbiHomeSkillet had a pretty moving voice when reciting the Torah and Kaddish which put the Kirkland tissue boxes into great use. Apres (Francais for “after”) the service, Grams decided she MUST see the body one last time and pet her “krasavchik” (translates as her “handsome,” her “pretty” …). Albeit after the ritual that seals the coffin and the body in it - Grams saw Gramps one last time… this truly being the last. Part of me wishes I had larger balls, and mustered the strength to fulfill the curiosity of seeing the Rigor of the Rigor Mortis… A bigger part is thankful I acted with restraint. As Madre says: Composure, and tend to Grams (and she’s hella right.). 
   4PM-415PM - the coffin is put into some stoic white stone-insulator shit and then lower by a FUCKING YELLOW BULLDOZER thing. probably the most UNSETTLING thing about the ceremony - and that’s including the death of the dead. whoever decided that the same bulldozers used for landscaping and construction should be used to lift sarcophagus-like shit over coffins was a re-tard. (Galifinakis style). Imagine machinery, squeaking, creaking, huffing, puffing, crackling, stopping, stalling, screeching to bury the dead. A moment of silence? Nay, a sweet little… nostalgic fucking serenade of the fucking industrial revolution. —- Sounded like death in the assembly lines. Grams might as well have fainted from the horror of the schieze. Once the sarcophagi-like thing is set, it’s lowered into the earth by a hand-pushed (think rolling a window down in a car) machine that needed WD-40 like none other. Squeaking was loud enough that RabbiHomeSkillet had to kick it up 3 notches in decibel. 
  415PM-Service Finished after every person in attendance tossed some Earth onto the lowered sarcophagus. Poetic. 
  425PM-8PM . The “Pominki” or “Remembrance” of sorts at TROYKA (Russian Restaurant in town/nearby). The FamBam + Guests toasted the life of Gramps, philosophized about what was next (after life, that is). Drank to get Drunk and finally, ensued a string of happy, hilarious, and trivial moments to force us all to look elsewhere and ponder positively. Optimism is key after all. I held Grams’ hand from 230PM until 8PM. She’d spent much time talking about his ironic, untimely death, and discussing with herself and others which way would have been better for him to go - random, ironic, almost instantaneous and painless… Or in a handful of years, possibly regressed… Most likely ailing. I spent many a minute saying that this was the better way… I still don’t know exactly what I think because I haven’t allowed myself the time to think of it too much. I feel as though it’ll haunt me if I do, and I cannot let her delve further into depression from anything I say or do. So - Composure! Composure! Composure it is, and Composure it will be. For quite some time.

9PM-10PM CASA MILA. Daddy Dearest (after drinking some) goes for a happy swim in the pool with friends, I feel a great relief that he’s finally spoken, and showed visible signs of acceptance, reconciliation and the like. I feel a great weight has been lifted - Grams is entertaining herself with household duties so as not to focus, Madre sleeps from consumption (not the cholera kind) and I discuss the school system with family friends. Whilst - Liza K. heads home to drop of Mammy and get her car to return to CASA MILA and come blog with me @ The Bourgeois Pig . As you can see - this did not happen. 10PM - LIZA K & I travel to The BPig (her first Pig visit). 

I popped Liza’s Bourgeois Cherry. ;-) 
«« «« Ran into Jon D., Elina Z. + the bunch.  Unexpected, nice.
 
«< 1030PM- 2:30AM THE BOURGEOIS PIG SWALLOWS ITS PATRONS AND ENTICES THEM WITH BRILLIANTLY APPROPRIATE CONVERSATIONS, SITUATIONS, and SUSTENANCE. 

I say AGAIN  - Cheers to the short amount of time we spend on this earth and what we find during that time. Cheers to friends, foes, forget-me-nots, and fuckwhats.  

Bonne Nuit. 
I’ll Bio-Up later.